Monday, November 25, 2013

Multi Level Attack

Q:What's more dangerous than a rampaging Elephant?
A:A rampaging elephant carrying bag full of angry bees.
I extended this further on both the sides of scale and this is what I got
Multi Level Attack

What we have here is a ruthless, mask wearing disgruntled office employee Elephant wielding a Nunchacku and carrying with it 4 bags of Religious Fanatic Viking Honeybees. 24 of such Elephants are packed into a ginormous bullet called bullet2.0.  Hundreds of such bullets serve as ammo for a 300m high Gattling gun. Tens of such Gattling gun are fixed onto a 3Km long arrow. Fifty such arrows are fixed as spikes to a 60Km tall club. Thousands of such towering clubs are built like monuments around a mini planet. Tens of such mini planet revolve around a belligerent star. Hundreds of such star revolve around a emotionally unstable black hole.

Now any non timid bacteria this might say bah, I'm not scared. But those honeybees are no ordinary bees. They are Religiously Fanatic Viking Honeybees. They are covered from head to tail with Pathogens of all kinds. And not just any ordinary pathogens. These pathogens have antimatter suspended in between their organelles.
Now this is dangerous. If any such black hole comes after you, no matter if you are a big fat mean planet or a dwarf termite you are in trouble.

Tuesday, November 19, 2013

What if buffaloes grew wings?

Karan told Wei " Hey did you read the papers? There's a new virus that's causing the buffaloes to grow wings!!". Wei wasn't amused, "That's a pathetic joke Karan". Karan replied " No seriously, some mad scientist's experimental virus escaped." I'll show you the videos online. And he showed videos of buffaloes spontaneously growing wings in hours and flying around the barns. One showed a particularly crafty buffalo air raiding the fodder storage, scaring off it's arch enemy the dog and flaunting it's wings in front of the jealous cows, singing "why should cows have all the fun?". 

Karan told wei "I wonder when will our buffaloes grow wings. I always wanted to ride a pegasus, this is close enough.". Wei shuddered at the thought of their huge barn filled with flying buffaloes. What if they fly off with the barn? What worried her perhaps the most was the thougth that Pigeons pooping on you - funny. Buffaloes doing the same - Not funny. Now Bullshit will not only hurt you psychologically, but also physically. But she also thought it's a golden opportunity to invent a BS protector. 

Karan exclaimed "I know how to put them to work, let's build a flying buffalo drawn carriage. Travel all over the clouds. We can have hybrid airplanes which uses gasoline for take off and buffalo power in the top. OK at that altitude the buffaloes will probably turn into frozen meat, but with thick enough jackets maybe we can pull it off, or in this case they can pull it up. Anyway the airspace will get crowded from all the loose buffaloes. Commercial air planes will probably have to be fitted with laser blasters to blast any buffalo in the path. After all no self respecting plane wants to be hit by a buffalo at 800km/h."

"You and your pipe dreams!" said Wei and off she went to watch the latest adventures of Bickey Buffalo, the cartoon show featuring anthropomorphized buffalo who only wore a bandana.

Thursday, October 10, 2013


I guess one useful way to measure wealth of a nation is the time into labor versus the amount of utility you get (Related to Big Mac Index). From my experience of living in India and US here are few observations.  Lets compare a software engineer paid about Rs 50k per month as software engineer in Bangalore to someone doing blue collar job like Subway worker in US getting 10$/hour.  For the software Engineer working on 40hrs/week x 4 weeks gives 160Hrs. Therefore 50k/160Hrs = 312 Rs/hr. Converting that into $ gives 5.2$/Hr, roughly half of US worker. The minimum wage according to Wikipedia is around 0.4$. Now this might sound less, but the cost of living is way less in India. It's strange that some things are cheap in India, and other things are actually cheaper in US. We can compare some stuff.

A Subway sandwich costs about 6$ in US while in India it may cost 2$. So a subway worker has to work 36mins to earn a sandwich while the Indian Software Engineer has to work 23mins. Eating out is generally costlier in US.

3$  in US, 40Rs in India

  1. US Worker: 20mins work in US
  2. Indian SW Engineer: 12mins of coding in India
  3. Indian Minimum wage worker (MWW): 130mins working.

Electronic items usually cost same in both the places.
600$ in US and India

  • US Worker: 60Hrs of work ~ 11days
  • SW Engineer: 120Hrs of work ~ 22days
  • Indian MWW: 1500Hrs of work ~ 9 months 

Here we see the stark difference in how poor India is. The minimum wage worker just can't afford to buy a 600$ smartphone. Which is why they usually buy the 100$ smartphone. These days even the blue collar workers have smartphone.

From my experience in US, Petrol, Electricity and any manufactured items are really cheap to its citizens. Anything that requires manual labor is costly. In India the opposite is true. Cheap housemaids are some of the few advantages of India, while plenty cheap stuff in WalMart is USAs advantage.
These are some of the interesting ways to compare the amount of work needed in different countries. 

Sunday, September 15, 2013

My Paintings

Here are the few Paintings, Drawings I had tried sometime ago, for more please visit this link: Paintings Album

Sunday, March 24, 2013

Bedtime Story

Hard day's work done, time to sleep
A temporary visit to Hades, rest, deep
Suddenly I woke up in the middle of the night
Something in the dark gave me a hair raising fright

A metallic sound was the culprit that woke me
What is it? I fathomed, but in the darkness I could not see
Fumbled around I for the lights, reaching the switch
It was too tight, too big, remained darkness like pitch

That sudden sound came again, like a heavy metal door being shut
Don't know what to do, am turning into a nut
Searched I here and there, couldn't see anything with my eyes
Scanned left and right with my antennas, nothing came that was nice

Finally I gave up, stopped worrying and got hold of myself
Perhaps a burglar, a murderer, why should I care, even for an elf
That's it, I'm not waking up for anything or anyone, ever again
Dozed off, had this weirdest dream, me holding umbrella in rain

In a city like any other, there lies a garbage dump
An Incinerator with conveyor belt guarded by a door that gave metallic thump
On the belt a sealed dark box with two things, one was a switch which didn't work like a charm 
Besides that slept a cockroach, peaceful and calm

Thursday, March 14, 2013

Hillside Hustle

On top of a steep hill lived an old lady
There the fauna was green and shady
Life was hard, but she managed to get by
Bread and lard, she ate not to die

All was as usual till one day a monstrous tiger came
Saw it through the window and thought she was game
Oh what to do, how to escape she thought
Don't give up hope, her mind fought

Should I give up the sheeps I toiled to raise
Trade their flesh for my own, her mind began to faze
She implemented this plan, let all the sheeps out
The tiger ate them all, like a ravenous lout

Now the tiger advanced to the house
This old lady was trapped like a mouse
She closed all the doors, reinforced with book stack
In came the tiger, ahhh, the window in the back

She closed the room doors, rickety and decreipt
What did you expect? She was old, the house was crypt
Came bursting through the door like vicious boar
One quick lunge and the lady was no more

The tiger dragged this prey to its cave nearby
Inside it lay three starving little cubs, about to die
They ate with gusto, gobbled with no gap
Back to life, they all took a nap